FacePalm Friday
Welcome to this week’s edition of FacePalm Friday.
This is where your hosts will list their top picks for this week’s FacePalm moment—something they learned or read about this week that caused the FacePalm to happen (you know, the expression of embarrassment, frustration, disbelief, shock, disgust or mixed humor as depicted in our Rally FacePalm smiley).
We invite you to add your FacePalm of the week to our comments. Go ahead and add a link, tell a personal story, or share something that triggered the FacePalm on the subject of child welfare or adoption.
(1)Created for Care Adoptive Mom Retreat where you can join others who believe
See here for “Bringing a child into your home through adoption IS NOT about how much love you have to give as the adoptive parent. Having love and not being poor and living on the streets isn’t the issue. The issue is the gospel. You are adopting because you now have the opportunity to bring the gospel to more people.”
and why countries close to adoption “Well, on the surface level I am sure that Satan HATES adoption because of its clear picture of the gospel, and because God calls us to care for those in need and Satan wants to ruin God’s plans!
Then again, from my social work perspective, adoption should be proceeded in a child-centered way, and ethics need to be a priority!! So situations where families reject legally adopted children, or adopted children aren’t really orphans- there needs to be investigation and best practice policies established!!! ”
So, the closures are mostly due to Satan 
and the families that disrupt. Maybe she should discern exactly who is Satan in adoptionland. She only passively mentions that adopted children may not be orphans but doesn’t even venture to guess why that might be. Don’t even bother to read the shallow descriptions for Nepal and Rwanda…
(2) “The Dream” and the doll that heard whispered prayers 
(3) Got Love? Adopt http://minus1project.blogspot.com/ and Adoption with a guitar for the “I” because apparently when you adopt, it is so cool that you are like 
or maybe 
(4)Lipscomb University’s Adoption Rally Fund
Last week, adoption invaded the Super Bowl. This week it’s basketball.
From Lipscomb University’s adoption program is a slam-dunk[The Tennessean 2/4/12 by Nancy DeVille], “The university recently launched Adoption Rally, a program that gives 100 percent of single-game ticket revenues to families in the process of adopting, either locally or internationally. Nine families have been helped by the program, and $17,000 has been distributed.”
Of course, Bethany Christian Services is the agency that benefits. One of the PAPs: the ” extra funds were the boost Buddy and Julie Harston needed to pay for travel expenses for their 11-year-old son, Aphiwe, who came to the U.S. from South Africa just before Christmas. The adoption was roughly $30,000.” South Africa? Who knew? Bethany started a program there in 2010. Bethany could cut out the international fee and reduce that cost so Adoption Rallies are not needed. 
Just Kidding. No agency would ever do that voluntarily unless it’s China Special Focus 5 for 1.
(5)Speaking of waiving China fees…
http://whitesadoptionjourney.blogspot.com/
“Immediate adoption need in China! Fees waived!” 
(6)Feeling so entitled that you should not have to wait the typical 10 day wait for bio family to contest the adoption in Ukraine
Read Hurry up and Wait 
It is very disturbing to read the disgusting feelings for the original family “The fact is that most, but not all, of the people in the Ukraine do not care even care about these kids.” yet “We have heard of some stories of biological parents visiting their children in the orphanage. These parents probably love their kid and know they just can’t care for them. As noble as this is I can only think that as time goes by this has got to be confusing for these kids; the situation made even more disconcerting if another family comes to adopt them. Most are happy when their child is adopted, but they still never look back as the new family takes them away.” How do you reconcile the original family visiting with not caring or not looking back? 
(7) MLJ’s justification for Choosing Samoa
http://mljadoptions.com/Media.aspx?articleID=392
First they assume that poverty = adoption. “According to UNICEF, approximately one third of all children in the country (7 million children) are considered poor and that one third of children under 5 years of age have stunted growth because of chronic malnutrition. This is a crisis.”
Then they claim China’s slowdown for healthy kids is do to “roadblocks”:”These families have been waiting patiently to bring children home from the same country as their other children, without luck. Even when these families reach out to other Asian countries to adopt, they are met with many road blocks, as adopting from Asian countries has become increasingly difficult. To adopt a healthy child from China, it is estimated that parents will wait approximately 5-6 years to bring a child home.”
Then they try to link their pilot program in SAMOA as a great substitution from Vietnam “MLJ is fortunate to have several successful country programs that may appeal families that have been waiting for Vietnam to re-open. Our newest pilot program in Samoa is an alternative for those interested in adopting an Asian child, as the children from Samoa are of Polynesian decent, with a culture that is influenced by Asia. It is said that the first migrants to Samoa were people from Southeast Asian.”
(8)Congo and A Love Beyond Borders Agency hard sell
“The Democratic Republic of the Congo (DRC) is quickly becoming recognized as a wonderful option for families looking to grow their families through adoption. The DRC has about 4.2 million orphan children due to significant poverty, death of one or more parents by HIV/AIDS, war and famine. There are many benefits to this program including fast processing times and very quick referrals. ” 
(9)Florida’s 29 days of Amazing African-American Children
Florida thinks that a great way to celebrate Black History Month is to highlight all the black children that are not being adopted in their foster care system.
(10) Parent Match® “Nation’s First and Only Network for Adoption Professionals Helping Families Adopting in the U.S.”
“Knowing I can connect with other adoption attorneys and agencies in a matter of seconds helps so much. I’ve already seen its potential to make a significant difference in how connections are made here in the United States between expectant mothers and prospective adoptive parents.”
Marni Denenberg, Director of Domestic Adoption Programs for Alliance for Children in Massachusetts, who was an early member of the Parent Match network and has been using it to match clients successfully, agrees. “Parent Match is a win for everyone involved – for the adopting couple, the expectant mother who may have certain wishes for her child and everyone working to find and create families,” says Denenberg.”
Reformatina says: 
…sounds like a good way to move expectant mom’s across state lines too…
(11) Teen Chooses adoption For Her Baby “advice” column
“Dr. Wallace: I met this really nice guy at the restaurant where we both worked, and we had dated for over a year. He was born in Mexico and so was my father. I really loved him, and I thought he loved me, too. About six months ago, I found out I was pregnant. When I told Jose, he said we had to get married, and I thought he meant it because that was what I wanted to hear. About a week after I told Jose about being a father, he didn’t show up for work. And now, months later, he still hasn’t appeared at work. It took me no time to figure out that he has fled across the border and isn’t coming back.
(12) She thinks that she is an authority on adoption and trafficking
“Thus began the journey that has increasingly turned Polston, a child advocate and author, into an authority on adoption and human trafficking.” Really? There is not one thing in the article that indicates that she has any knowledge or experience with human trafficking.
(13)Empty Nesters adopt multiple special needs kids that they can’t afford to raise
Empty Nesters Adopting Special Kids Running Out Of Money[KPLR 2/9/12 by Melanie Moon]
“5-year old Shruthie Reed arrived in the U.S. From India almost 2 years ago. She was born with Larsen’s Syndrome, a congenital disorder that left her with severe joint dislocations and legs that were backwards. Shruthie would have likely remained that way if not for the love of Bob and Cathy Reed. The Reed’s adopted Shruthie from an orphanage in July 2010. Soon after arriving in the us surgeons turned Shruthie’s legs around and today she is walking with braces.
Shruthie is not the first special needs child the reeds have welcomed into their home. Several years earlier the couple adopted Jacob and Kaley from China. Both children had cleft palates. Jacob also suffers with a blood disorder and a mild form of autism.
While the love is always there, the money is sometimes not. Bob, who has worked as an EMS worker for 34 years recently had his hours cut. So, the couple had to give up their home and move in with their adult daughter and her family.
It’s an adjustment that has made the family even closer. Big sister Michelle Rogers says she relishes her job as mentor to her younger siblings and adds they’re teaching her a thing or two.
“Looking at Shruthie, she was always joyful, no matter what her condition was, nothing let her down, she was always happy and made me look at my own situation. I have no room to complain.” said Michelle Rogers.
Her parents aren’t complaining either. They say despite their hard time they wouldn’t change a thing. And add this is the family they were always meant to be.
Shruthie was not communicating at all, in any language when she arrived in the U.S. In 2010. Now, she is almost reading and talking at a kindergarten level. The reed’s had help from church members converting their daughter’s basement into a living space for the family but they’re still looking for helping adding a bathroom to the basement.
So if you’re a plumber or no [sic] someone who can help call the Reeds…”
Hee hee