How Could You? Hall of Shame-Britney Tongel case-child death

This will be an archive of heinous actions by those involved in child welfare, foster care and adoption. We forewarn you that these are deeply disturbing stories that may involve sex abuse, murder, kidnapping and other horrendous actions.

From Trevorton, Pennsylvania, one of the 2011 cases that we missed revealed that foster child Britney Tongel, 17, died in an apparent suicide after allegations of being bullied on the internet and school.

” The death of a 17-year-old Line Mountain High School sophomore, reportedly by suicide at her Trevorton home in Northumberland County, has sparked an outcry about bullying.

Facebook exploded in a firestorm of comment Thursday as news of the death of Britney Tongel spread. Among the accusations, which could not be confirmed, made in a number of Facebook posts is that two girls had recently posted messages on a social networking site created by Tongel suggesting she kill herself, “and she did,” one person wrote.

Other posts said the same two girls, who were named online, had been harassing Tongel for weeks, although other posts showed friendly exchanges between one of the girls and Tongel.

Meanwhile, by 10 p.m. Thursday, 3,003 people had visited the “R.I.P. Britney Tongel 2/16/2011” Facebook page to express support for the family and criticize one commentor who was making negative statements about the victim.

Police probe

State police at Stonington reported late Wednesday they were investigating the death. On Thursday, Northumberland

County Coroner James F. Kelley confirmed the girl’s death, and said Deputy Coroner James R. Gotlob pronounced her dead at 7:05 a.m. Wednesday.

Police and the coroner’s office did not release the girl’s name, Kelley saying he was following the protocol of state police in withholding the name of a juvenile. However, The News-Item of Shamokin confirmed the victim’s name – which was widely used on the Internet – through a family friend who was in touch with her foster parents.

The parents, Terry and Lisa Laforme, who live along Route 225 in Trevorton, said they would like to comment but would not do so while the investigation into their daughter’s death continues.

They said they would not confirm that Britney’s death was a suicide, again citing the investigation.

Tongel was originally from Berwick and began attending Line Mountain late last school year.

Police said in their statement Wednesday that “no foul play” is suspected, but they also did not identify it as a suicide. Police and the coroner’s office continue to investigate, Kelley said, but neither had issued an update as of late Thursday.

School copes

As the shocking news spread throughout the community, Line Mountain Superintendent David Campbell said counselors were available at specific locations in the school throughout the day Thursday. Also, a team was doing “risk assessment” by interacting with students and looking for those who showed signs of struggle.

Campbell stressed students have a right to see a counselor and seek help, and that anyone needing assistance is urged to contact the high school guidance office.

One Line Mountain student said Thursday was a tough day.

“The atmosphere in school today was really gloomy, but people were wearing black for Britney and yellow to represent (the fight against) bullying,” said Scott Madison, a junior from Trevorton. He said he had spoken to Tongel a few times, but didn’t know her well.

Madison said he sees bullying as a huge problem among youngsters today, but that it’s mostly through texting, Myspace or Facebook, not so much in person.

Campbell said there was no indication to faculty of a problem at Line Mountain.

“It’s starting to move off campus,” he said. “Kids are getting smarter with bullying.”

With that, Campbell said it’s ultimately parents who need to be educated about the signs of cyberbullying. The district is organizing a nighttime assembly for parents on the topic, he said.

Also, faculty and then students received training on bullying in school through programs such as Olweus, described as a comprehensive, school-wide program designed and evaluated for use in elementary, middle or junior high schools. The program has been implemented in more than a dozen countries around the world and in thousands of schools in the United States.

Campbell said he wants any students who notice bullying to speak up, and that the best thing is to get students talking about the issue.

Community reaction

By Thursday night, another Facebook page, “Bracelets in honor of Britney Tongel,” had been created. It’s listed intent is to raise money for funeral expenses through the sale of $2 bracelets.

Meanwhile, a Trevorton priest said parents should be quick to respond to bullying, even if they don’t believe their child is a bully or a victim of bullying.

“I think the adult community has to recognize that these things must be taken seriously and that there should be absolute ways of dealing with people who bully,” said the Rev. Adrian Gallagher, pastor at St. Patrick Church, who was asked to comment on the tragedy in the community where he preaches.

“The people who bully others need help and need to be brought into a situation so they understand what it feels like,” he said.

Told of reports that Britney had committed suicide, Gallagher said, “Sadly enough, she has taken her life, and it’s an indication to all of us who remain how devastating it can be.”

Line Mountain teen’s death sparks outcry about bullying
[Republican Herald 2/18/11 by Thomas Leskin]

” Trevorton woman said her daughter was so upset about the continued bullying of Britney Tongel that she started a fight with one of the alleged bullies that resulted in a 20-day suspension from school.

The incident shortly before the Christmas break is further indication, the mother said, that Line Mountain officials were aware of bullying involving Tongel, a 17-year-old sophomore who was found dead Wednesday morning in her Trevorton home, reportedly by suicide.

“I’m just astonished that they act like they know nothing about it,” the mother, who declined to give her name, said about school officials. “They know who my daughter stood up for.”

The woman said she contacted The News-Item after reading comments from the father of a student and Superintendent Dave Campbell’s reaction in a story in Saturday’s edition. The father said he had approached high school Principal Jeffrey Roadcap two months ago about his daughter and Tongel being bullied, but Campbell, in response, reiterated his position that the school was not aware of a problem. Roadcap was not available for comment Friday.

When contacted Saturday night about the Trevorton woman’s claim that school officials were aware of bullying involving Tongel, Campbell said, “We received no reports from Tongel’s foster parents about bullying. As far as a fight involving one of the alleged bullies, I’m not going to talk about that issue because I can’t. It’s a private incident. The family can talk about it, but I can’t.”

According to discussions online about Tongel’s death, two girls had reportedly posted messages on a social networking site created by Tongel telling her to kill herself. State police at Stonington are investigating the case, and said Friday they are aware of the bullying allegations and are pursuing that angle. Police have taken possession of Tongel’s computer.

Tongel was pronounced dead at 7:05 a.m. Wednesday. A cause of death has not been revealed by police or the Northumberland County Coroner’s Office.

Tongel’s foster parents, Terry and Lisa Laforme, who live along Route 225 in Trevorton, have told The News-Item they would like to comment on the situation, but will not while the investigation into their daughter’s death continues.

Meanwhile, however, those in the community are speaking up.

The mother who called Saturday said she believes she knows the identity of the father who was quoted because of their shared connection to Tongel’s bullying. Both have asked to remain anonymous, fearing further problems for their daughters.

The woman said she knows her daughter was wrong for starting the fight and deserved to be punished, but that the scars of a physical confrontation can quickly heal, while those left by bullying take much longer to go away, if they do at all.

She said she wasn’t aware if the other girl involved in the fight was punished.

The mother said she realizes school officials can’t do much about the alleged cyberbullying involved in this and other cases, but that they should “take some responsibility.”

She said her understanding of the issue with Tongel is that it started online, but carried into the school. The woman said her daughter warned the girl who was bullying Tongel to leave her alone, but that it got worse, and that’s why she eventually started a fight with the girl.

Campbell has said that the school addresses bullying through in-school programs, and that an assembly that would involve parents is being planned. He said the fact that so many students use digital technology is taking bullying “off-campus,” and that parents need to be aware of the problem, too.

Meanwhile, the mother said she has been in touch with Britney’s foster care caseworker, and that “we’re not going to stop until something’s done.”

A vigil in tribute to Tongel is planned for 6:30 p.m. today at the Trevorton Athletic Association baseball fields at the west end of the village.”

Mother says her daughter fought against one of Britney’s bullies
[News Item 2/20/11 by Andy Heintzelman]

“Lisa LaForme has gotten a few strange looks as she walks the halls of local high schools, but that’s OK. She wants to be noticed.

The Trevorton woman is intent on spreading a message about the consequences of bullying, especially cyber-bullying, which is blamed in the suicide of her foster daughter, Britney Tongel, who was found dead in her bedroom on the morning of Feb. 16.

Over the past month, LaForme has been to Berwick, Danville, Mount Carmel Area, Shikellamy and even Line Mountain, where Britney was a sophomore at the time of her death. She is typically escorted, per school policy, but she said the reception has been mostly positive.

What is she trying to accomplish?

“I want them to remember Britney. I want them to remember the circumstances of her death. And I want them to stop bullying,” she said.

She said if a bully sees her that day, and decides they won’t act as they normally would, that’s a victory.

“If I can get one to stop, then another, then another …,” LaForme said.

She says many people tell her how bullying has always existed, but she doesn’t believe it has to be that way. Also, she said, it’s reached a crisis point, noting not only her daughter’s death, but those of young people nationwide, particularly related to cyber-bullying.

Satisfying visit to MCA
LaForme said she made a special connection at Mount Carmel Area (MCA), and those at the school say the feeling is mutual.

LaForme first dropped by unannounced to present one of her Britney memorial fundraising T-shirts to Ashley Stief, winner of the school’s anti-bullying T-shirt contest, which LaForme had read about in the newspaper. Also, the school’s anti-bullying committee had already sent the family sympathy cards after Britney’s death.

After that, the administration decided to reach out to LaForme and invite her back to address the student body, both as a lesson for the students, but also to recognize that their previous efforts with the sympathy cards had made an impact.

MCA has anti-bullying sessions every two weeks, but usually in individual classrooms. For LaForme’s visit, she addressed the assembled student body.

“I do think she had a very positive influence,” said Donna Veach, junior high school principal. “A lot of what she said I think the kids did really relate to.”

LaForme noted many students gave her a hug after her speech, and she said one girl promised to go room-to-room and “spread Britney’s love.”

“To me, that was tremendous. It was really fantastic,” LaForme said.

At Danville, she noted a wall in the cafeteria where students sign an oath of responsibility. “It’s so impressive,” LaForme said.

On the evening of April 19, she was at Berwick High School – Britney had once attended school there – and sat in on a bullying assembly.

“I couldn’t sit through the whole presentation,” she said. “It really, really hit me.”

Still, the next morning, she walked the halls of the high school and elementary school in that Luzerne County community.

Connect to students
LaForme said she has spent much time since Britney’s death addressing parents, but decided to switch her focus to students.

“We need to effect these children,” she said. “At high school age, they need to know. I tell them exactly what I found that morning.”

Britney’s foster mom walks school halls
[News Item 4/29/11 by Andy Heintzelman]
“A judge has temporarily ordered Britney Tongel’s foster family to stop using her name and likeness to raise money.

Columbia County President Judge Thomas James ruled in favor of Carey Ann Torres and Marguerita Nimlo, Tongel’s mother and grandmother, respectively, both of Berwick, on Monday, in their request for “injunctive relief.”

Torres and Nimlo filed the court action against husband and wife Terry and Lisa LaForme and their daughter, Misty, all of Trevorton, over their efforts to raise money for a memorial fund established after the death of Tongel, who committed suicide in the LaFormes’ home on Feb. 16.

Torres and Nimlo had tried to stop the LaFormes’ from carrying out the “Britney Tongel Bullying Awareness Cruise-In” that was held Saturday in Mifflinburg. That went on as planned. But the LaFormes had been served papers on Friday and had to appear for a hearing in the Bloomsburg courtroom on Monday, at which James made his ruling.

“They were using my granddaughter and soliciting funds in my granddaughter’s name without our permission. We want that to stop,” Nimlo said Tuesday.

Lisa LaForme, however, stressed the money wasn’t used for personal gain.

“We weren’t doing this to hurt anyone or to make money. The money was going to go to the funeral parlor and her headstone,” she said in discussing the issue Tuesday.

She noted the urgent court appearance prevented them from having a lawyer.

“We didn’t really speak much because we felt like we needed an attorney present,” Lisa LaForme said.

She has been visiting schools to raise awareness about cyberbullying, which she and Tongel’s friends blame for her death. LaForme had described in previous stories how people have reached out to help her, including those who organized Saturday’s cruise-in.

While James granted the order Monday, further court action in the case is expected.

The judge, while noting that the LaFormes “had good intentions,” according to a story in the (Bloomsburg) Press Enterprise, also ordered all money in a bank account set up in Britney’s name be frozen.

Bullying questioned
Tongel, who was a sophomore at Line Mountain High School at the time of her death, had been living with the LaFormes for 11 months.

Nimlo repeated in Tuesday’s phone interview an argument she made in court that Britney’s death should not be blamed on bullying.

“The state police haven’t found anything. There is no actual proof that she was being bullied. I couldn’t find it,” said Nimlo. She said she wouldn’t speculate otherwise on why the family believes Britney took her own life, and also wouldn’t elaborate on why she was in foster care.

LaForme disagrees, saying the proof is on Facebook.

“All they had to do is look on the Internet. The nasty notes were still posted on the Internet the day after she died,” she said.

At the time of her death, accusations were made that two girls had recently posted messages on a social networking site created by Tongel suggesting she killer herself. After her death, Internet posts included photos of Tongel with captions that said, “LOL DEAD,” “I deserve to be bullied” and “She is better off dead,” among other more vulgar comments.

State police said that same week they were pursuing the “bullying angle,” although no charges have been filed.

Headstone purchase
Lisa LaForme said she was told the biological family was not going to purchase a headstone, and that’s why she was raising funds for one.

Nimlo said that was news to her family.

“We already had one picked out and everything. We were shocked,” she said Tuesday.

Nimlo said her family has no intention to raise any funds in Britney’s name, and she doesn’t want the LaFormes doing it either.

“The Britney fund. The Britney T-shirts and bracelets and sticking out cans. Doing rallies” all must stop, said Nimlo.

Torres could not be reached for comment Tuesday. A photograph from the Press Enterprise’s coverage of Monday’s proceeding showed Torres sticking up both middle fingers at a photographer as she arrived at the courthouse.

Younger brother upset
As explained in the lawsuit, Lisa LaForme visited Orange Street Elementary School in Berwick, which is attended by Britney’s brother, Dominick Tongel, 9, who was upset when he saw his sister’s face on LaForme’s T-shirt.

“When he approached Mrs. LaForme in the hallway to inform her that she had his sister’s face on her T-shirt, she introduced herself and said, ‘That’s my daughter.’ Dominick immediately and quickly left the defendant, extremely upset,” the lawsuit reads.

The biological family said the LaFormes have had other instances where they have “incorrectly and inappropriately” referred to Britney as their daughter.

Lisa LaForme has written several letters to the editor since Tongel’s death and has referred to her as “foster daughter.” News surrounding her death has repeatedly identified the LaFormes as foster parents.

Also, in late February 2011, the LaFormes participated in a CBS News interview about cyberbullying despite the biological family’s objection of it through KidsPeace, the foster agency, according to the lawsuit. It says that when the LaFormes were informed of this decision, they quit the agency and participated in the interview.

Lisa LaForme has said previously that people wanted her not to talk about the death in light of the foster program, but that she didn’t feel it was appropriate to be silent about the issue or that her free speech should be stifled. She said her family has taken in “hundreds” of foster children over many years.

Speaking out
LaForme said she’s pleased the court decision won’t keep her from speaking out about bullying, which she says is her primary goal.

“I didn’t want to lose my rights to be able to go the anti-bullying rallies and speak. The money is the furthest thing from my mind,” she said.

She doesn’t want people to forget “the circumstances of Britney and her death.”

“It needs to be known what’s going on in these schools and the Internet for these kids,” she said.

‘Britney’ fundraisers stopped by court due to biological parents’ complaints
[News Item 5/4/11 by Justin Strawser]

REFORM Puzzle Piece

The stories stopped after the lawsuit was filed in this case in May 2011. No charges have been filed against anyone and no one has officially stated that bullying was the reason for the suicide. The reasons for her being in foster care have not been stated. According to her obituary, she had 6 brothers and sisters and was on the track, cross country and basketball teams.