FacePalm Friday
Welcome to this week’s edition of FacePalm Friday.
This is where your hosts will list their top picks for this week’s FacePalm moment—something they learned or read about this week that caused the FacePalm to happen (you know, the expression of embarrassment, frustration, disbelief, shock, disgust or mixed humor as depicted in our Rally FacePalm smiley).
We invite you to add your FacePalm of the week to our comments. Go ahead and add a link, tell a personal story, or share something that triggered the FacePalm on the subject of child welfare or adoption.
Your Host’s Selections:
(1) Andrea Roberts interviews about Russia here and here.
How many 
can you count?
(2) Latvia and Ukraine…apparently the new go-to countries 
And hey there is this hosting service here. They claim that there are 5 BILLION orphans. Yep. And we are to believe that adoption has nothing to do with proselytizing,
?
This is why:
“The orphan count that really counts: 5 billion
As time passes, I become increasingly aware that the real number of orphans in the world is about 5 billion.
That’s the current number of men and women on planet earth who have not accepted God’s plan for adoption.
There are about 7 billion people living on our planet. It’s estimated that about 2 billion of us have said “yes” to God and His plan to adopt us as sons and daughters, and make us joint heirs with His dear son Jesus.
God has made His “family plan” so simple… and the world has made it so complicated.
From the time of God’s earliest communication with mankind, God made it very clear: “Today, I set before you life and death. Choose life!”
Why have 5 billion current inhabitants of planet earth not yet chosen life? Why would they prefer “death”? The reason hasn’t changed over the years: because they believe they know more than God and don’t wish to be a part of His eternal family.
God is still issuing His call to be adopted, to a part of His family, daily. Let us pray that the eyes of 5 billion children will be opened, and that they will accept the invitation to come into God’s big family!”
(3)More Reece’s: $300,000 for the Angel Tree this year
Can you imagine how many kids could be helped if that money was used to improve orphanage care or train local workers? But this is the money that will go to the agencies and assorted providers.
(4)JCICS’ Tom DiFilipo “only 19” comment (regarding US abuse and death of Russian adoptees)
He says it here.
Land of Gazillion Adoptees explains it well here
(5)Rosie O’Donnell’s Instagram adoption announcement
See here
(6) Both Ends Burning-new screenplay and the Empty Stroller march will go on in Spring 2013
See here. The great cross-pollinator Craig Juntunen is back. 
The industry just 
this guy!
Idiots who successfully adopt 2 Bulgarian kids (like we’re officially declared the children’s mother in December 2012) and doesn’t have the cash to bring the kids home. Denise davis is still trying to beg $19k from strangers for agency fees and travel costs:
http://nachalaadopt2.blogspot.com/2012/01/pet-orphan-rocks-to-adopt.html?m=1
What happens if the $ isn’t donated? Do the kids sit in the orphanage forever? (The family has blogged that they can’t get a loan, have no possessions left to sell and are already depend on Shriners and St Jude’s to provide free healthcare they can’t afford for their existing kids, let alone 2 more).
Is #3 serious? Come on!! Look, the Reece’s Rainbow angel tree stuff is dubious at best. The arbitrary “extend the deadline to Orthodox Christmas” was even more humorous. Continuing to raise money for Russian orphans who are not legally available for adoption because we just “know” they will be someday is probably unethical. But are you actually posing the question of how many orphans would be helped with $300,000? Yes, apparently you are. And this is the problem with the writers here; the ones who believe in this utopian “just send money and drop it from the sky and children will magically be helped and adoption will go away”. Let’s see. Out of $300K, at least 1/3 of that in ANY sending country will go to government officials – those corrupt folks that will buy Lexus SUVs (TRUE story). Now we have $200K. Let’s be generous and say $50K is spent on playground equipment – really nice stuff, too. The same stuff that will eventually rust from non use because nobody has the time or inclination to take children out to play on it. But it sure will look good when those same government officials show up to some orphanage, park their Lexus, and smile at the director for their shiny new swings. $150K left. Let’s upgrade EVERY orphanage in, say, Ethiopia, which really high quality therapy equipment. We’ll have rooms dedicated to addressing the physical needs of children. Except that room will gather dust too, as few people are trained to use it, and fewer still have the time to take children there for it to be used. That’ll probably use up $100K. With our remaining $50K, we’ll target some orphanages to increase staffing and provide significant wages for the workers. Except that wages do not equate to understanding of children with special needs and doesn’t instill value in their lives. So these well paid workers can still treat their charges like you-know-what and get some fabulous paychecks for their efforts. Or, let’s change the breakdown and, accounting for our hungry bureaucrats, we’ll spend the rest on campaigns in sending countries to extol the virtues of adoption and children with special needs. That’ll buy us a lot of airtime or ink…and probably not get very far.
Angel tree is stupid, but so is suggesting that orphans would be helped in a substantive, long lasting way with $300K. You wanna ship an ocean container of sneakers and meal replacement bars, maybe a couple of bottles of aspirin along with your $300K? Great. And it’s just a band aid on a problem that keeps on bleeding.
We didn’t say send a $300K check to the orphanage director.Don’t be stupid. We are for prudent use of money. What this shows is that people are willing to give money, but it only for self-interest purposes-to get themselves or their religious buddies a child. Again, I mentioned training of social workers. Of course training people is important. That would not be a band-aid. Or say setting up foster care in the regions where it is not as robust or training more foster parents (they have already started this in Russia)-also would not be a bandaid or gasp! family preservation type activities are never on the list for fundraising for these people. And no I don’t think $300K would cover all costs. I didn’t say that. This organization raises money for self-interest only not to better the child welfare of any country. They constantly complain that child welfare is no good yet they continue to put money in for things that do not assist the future of anyone but themselves.
Reece’s Rainbow is also pretty notorious fôr NOT giving the cash raised to the family that raised it, as happened to the Higbies:
http://savinglera.blogspot.com/2012/07/the-scoop.html?m=1
This family has already spent nearly $72k in agency fees to adopt 4 unrelated girls Russian girls (1 young girl with DS + 3 teens via a “hosting” program) in the past year or two and hasn’t even travelled for their first trip yet!
Re: http://savinglera.blogspot.com/2012/07/the-scoop.html?m=1
“…”…Our total to date is $71, 726.51. That total is mind-boggling. We have paid, and paid, and paid…We are emptied every bank account, retirement account, every college fund set up for our other children, our savings, and we have sold most of what we own…and we have a few amazing friends who have help us financially to continue this fight. Every penny of that has been paid out to agency fees. We do not expect to see one penny of the FSP that is held for L. At this point we remain $8k short to make our first trip, but we are confident once our current paperwork is submitted and reviewed we will be invited to travel and given the opportunity to accept her referral. When that happen, the funds will be there. We know God’s got this.
Truth be told, most every one of you reading this would have given up on L long ago. Many of you have PM’d me and told me so. But this isn’t about our family doing a good and heroic thing in “saving” her. It isn’t about being easy or convenient. It’s about following Jesus in complete obedience. Those of you who read my blog should know by now… We see this through very narrow vision. We do not have the option of quitting. Following Jesus is inconvenient. It’s expensive. It calls us to give up things the world, and our American society hold sacred…when what we should all be focusing on is COMPLETE SURRENDER to Him…”
Hasn’t anyone heard that it’s wrong to presume to know the mind of God? Their other children don’t have any collage funds, they have no savings left to shield them against the sudden vicissitudes of life… and the PAPs are too hypnotized by their conviction that they’re on a Mission from God to consider stopping their quest!
I am not aware of any passage in the Bible that says that God will refund money taken by fraud either. At what point do these people consider the evidence at hand that they are judging their circumstance incorrectly?
Maybe if the Higbies hadn’t falsified a homestudy and tried to get the money fraudulently… it wouldn’t have been an issue.
RR money is NEVER released until a travel date has been issued from the adopting country.
Russia’s banned Americans from adopting, and few details exist regarding whether in-progress adoptions that had not passed court by December 1, 2012, will go forward – but why should that stop godly Christian Reece’s Rainbow PAPs from soliciting cash from strangers to complete their Russian adoptions:
abellblendedblessings.blogspot.com/2013/01/giving-up-is-not-option.html
amiracleformeg.blogspot.com/2013/01/can-you-hear-people-sing.html
hopkinsfamilyadoption.blogspot.com
farleykids.blogspot.com
adoptiongrove.blogspot.com/2013/01/traveling-on-wing-and-prayer.html
adoptiongrove.blogspot.com/2013/01/day-1-of-gotcha-trip.html
Do you think they’ll give the $$ back if they do not manage to kid the kids home???
More trouble accessing RR funds – one of the families above is now directing donations to their RR adoptions to a different website:
http://followingwheregodleadsus.blogspot.com/2013/01/donations.html?m=1
Curiouser and curiouser.
Very strange. I am also disturbed that organizations set up to help parents *already parenting their children* are now going to divert funds to these referred children who may or may not end up being adopted by these people.
Oh my. You’re right – particularly since Apert International’s goal is to:
“Our financial goal is to use 98% or more of all monies received for direct assistance to families. All of our administrative and fundraising efforts are provided by caring individuals on a volunteer basis.”
http://www.apert-international.org/
This family saw the light and conceded that their quest to adopt this Russian boy is over. But they’re keeping the cash they’ve received so far, because it was demanded with “pure intentions”:
http://followingwheregodleadsus.blogspot.com/2013/01/heart-broken.html
That is sick, unethical,immoral and sinful.If they cared about the Russian orphans, they would donate to one of the families that may be able to still bring their child home in this next year if they aren’t giving the money back to those that donated. They should be ashamed of themselves but I doubt that they will be. If they were a nonprofit soliciting funds, this would be misappropriation and illegal.
Two RR families agreed to be interviewed by the NYT – they’ve passed court but can’t get adoption decrees, as the judge said she must wait for guidance from the Russian Supreme Court before doing so:
http://www.nytimes.com/2013/01/16/world/europe/in-russia-ban-on-us-adoptions-creates-rancor-and-confusion.html?_r=0
I didn’t think this would happen to the Preeces, whose post-court 30 day wait ended on Dec. 29/12, before the ban came into effect on Jan. 1/13 but blogger Rebecca J called it earlier this week:
“1. There are a LOT of families who had court in December (and end of November) who are currently in Russia trying to obtain a court decree. Personally I wouldn’t try it. Right now the judges don’t want to lose their jobs and they’re afraid that if they do the wrong thing, release the wrong child that isn’t on Moscow’s list that they’ll be fired. They are waiting to hear from the Supreme Court, from the Federal MoE and from Putin’s office as to what they are supposed to do. Until they hear, they’re not going to release court decrees etc. Now I may be wrong about this, you might see one slip through (if someone’s close to retiring or for some other reason isn’t worried about job security you might see one slip through but I highly doubt it).”
http://marinecorpswife-russianadoptivemom.blogspot.com/2013/01/belated-post.html?m=0
It is an awful, heartbreaking families to be in. (And I probably shouldn’t say this because it is sorta awful to say about families who are, well, heartbroken, but… my spidey-sense tells me that before the end of the week both the Preeces and the Bonners — both fundraised pretty much 100% of their adoption costs — will be begging for cash from strangers to be able to afford to stay in Moscow until the mess is sorted out.
(According to the NYT, the Preeces are staying at the Moscow Mariott Grand Hotel. A five-star hotel rooms starting at $250/night).
Although it stinks being the RR families interviewed by the NYT, waiting in Moscow for their court decrees, I noticed that an “Alla V. Prozorova” was quoted. The NYT reporter stated she’d been facilitating Russian adoptions for 14 years.
Would she be the same “Alla” who was employed by Ivan Jerdev with Yunona? Wouldn’t surprise me. The lady at Adoption Ark was also an Ivan Jerdev refusnick.
I have a question – in the article it states that Europeans do NOT adopt S/N kids. I want to say there is a reason for this – their health care systems won’t allow it. Somebody mentioned that to me years ago – and somebody out there correct me if I’m wrong.
All said, this adoption ban is the roosters coming home to roost for the American international adoption industry.
I have also been told that the health care system in Europe disallows it. This was also told to me by people in the adoption industry as a reason that Italy would receive so many infant EE referrals.
Rally:
Thanks for the clarification. That’s what aggrevates me when I see these comments from the adoption industry. “The Americans are the ONLY ONES who will adopt the special needs kids! Those evil, uncaring Europeans WON’T adoption them! Shame on them!”
As you rightly pointed out, the Europeans CAN’T adopt them. Just another lie to keep the machine rolling.