FacePalm Friday
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Welcome to this week’s edition of FacePalm Friday.
This is where your hosts will list their top picks for this week’s FacePalm moment—something they learned or read about this week that caused the FacePalm to happen (you know, the expression of embarrassment, frustration, disbelief, shock, disgust or mixed humor as depicted in our Rally FacePalm smiley).
We invite you to add your FacePalm of the week to our comments. Go ahead and add a link, tell a personal story, or share something that triggered the FacePalm on the subject of child welfare or adoption.
Your Host’s Selections:
(1) Collector has to make her Facebook page private due to Congo “issues”
Here is their Precious.org story http://www.precious.org/articles?id=286&utm_source=Waiting+Children+Newsletter&utm_campaign=f11987c893-Hermon+and+Hiyab&utm_medium=email
Click on their How Many is 2 Many blog to read about she the “issues”: http://howmanyis2many.blogspot.com/
(2) 3-at-once new Russian Adoption documentary sponsored by CCAI and NCFA called The Dark Matter of Love
Sponsoring risky behavior and trying to gloss over the risks is disgusting.
This film is too little, too late. Epic Fail.
(3) Global Adoption Services dba Ranch for Kids is applying for Hague accreditation. They applied in May 2012 and still are on the list as of April 1, 2013.
, COA. Show the world that you have some kind of standard and will deny this application.
This is what I picture happens in a COA office Then this
(4) and (5) are hand-wringing critiques of Child Catchers.
The first one is at http://www.rickmortononline.com/2013/04/19/some-additional-thoughts-in-respose-to-kathryn-joyces-critique-of-evangelical-adoption-and-orphan-care/ He misses so many points. He talks about “defender of the defenseless and the voice of the voiceless” yet he leaves out any discussion on how the whole poor family needs this. He does not acknowledge the real number of children in orphanages-2 million not 163 million nor does he acknowledge that most of those children have families. With no knowledge of the system, he declares that the problems are not systemic. Does he realize how many countries have shut down in the past few years due to corruption? Unbalanced examples, he claims. He needs to come here and read how often those examples happen, how deeply they go and how the entire system is set up to fail.
The second one is at http://www.christianpost.com/news/left-launches-attack-on-evangelical-adoption-94832/ First, like most of these reviewers, they are self-absorbed in their own adoptive parenting and are immediately offended that anything bad is being said about adoption. From there, they throw out strawman after strawman.
I lost track of the number of strawmen that he threw out: saying that by pointing out the issues, that nothing Christians do is virtuous. Who the heck ever said that? NO ONE.
“The idea that my friends and family, who love their adopted children more than they love their own lives, have “orphan fever” is disgusting” Um…this is what these people PUT ON T-SHIRTS and sell and hand out to family and friends.
“unapologetic advocates for abortion-on-demand” Once again, corruption in adoption is a SEPARATE subject from abortion. Nope Abortion and adoption ARE NOT OPPOSITES.
His idea of a horror story is a lone example of Torry Hansen. He hasn’t a clue on how many abuses there are because he has never bothered to open his eyes and look.
He goes on to kiss the feet of Bethany and again cannot connect how children are trafficked into adoption.
Lastly, he thinks that paying a lot of money somehow makes things ethical.
APs who are not licensed therapists giving really bad advice to their fellow APs whose newly adopted kids are struggling. Advice like:
“A psychiatric disorder is NOT a medical disease.”
?!?!!!
Denying a child’s illness, failing to seek help from a licensed health professional will help a sick kid, how, exactly?
“Whatever you are facing is not bigger than a dead Jesus. And if the power that raised Christ from the dead is available to you…how dare you be hopeless.
I am so thankful that our pediatrician had this same mindset all those years ago. And, that the 2 very honest specialists she referred us to…concurred”.
My bible seems to be missing the page where Jesus forbids sick people from praying AND also seeking medical care. There are also a whole lot of priests/pastors/other religious leaders who openly 1) pray for sick people, 2) encourage parishioners to pray for sick people and (gasp!!) 3) visit sick people in hospitals to pray with/for them.
http://attachinghearts.blogspot.com/2013/04/you-must-listen-to-this.html?m=0
PAPs who believe Guatemalan greed is the reason they cannot bring the child they’d hoped to adopt home after 6+ years of trying.
Not corruption, human trafficking, documented cases of children being stolen from their mothers (some of whom were murdered) or the fact that oodles of money from foreign PAPs exacerbated any of those evils. Or that many of the kids in the adoption pipeline had families that loved and wanted to raise them.
“I wanted to be happy. I wanted to feel like it gave me hope. Instead I was angry. Beyond angry. One. One small child. In six years, only one. Why? Heh, you would think that there was a huge complicated reason why almost one hundred innocent children are not allowed to go to the loving homes waiting for them. Nope, it’s simple. Greed. The entities in Guatemala that govern adoptions will not cooperate because they all want the power and the money. They are unwilling to share, so the children and the families continue to suffer.
Ever since I first saw this story I have not been able to stop thinking about my girl. Undoubtedly she does not remember me. The last time I saw her was when we were bringing Ahren home. That was over 4 years ago. Soon after that they took her form her foster family and placed her in an orphanage. It took me almost a year just to find out where she was living. The orphanage does not allow visits. Heck, they just are not very nice people and they won’t even promise me that if I send gifts for her she would get them. Whatever I send they will use in whatever way they see fit, I have no say.”
Duh. The PAP is not the parent – she has no legal rights to a kid who IS NOT HER CHILD.
http://adoptingahren.blogspot.com/2013/05/weighing-on-my-mind.html
Name,
I posted the following in response to a critical “review” of Kathryn Joyce’s ‘The Child Catchers’ on Amazon, which focused on Joyce’s supposed anti-evangelical bias:
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Your post: Apr 30, 2013 9:49:21 AM PDT
Astrin Ymris says:
bsm1970,
Re: “…their “culture” is one of the most extreme poverty and often desperate illness and disability…”
Then wouldn’t the truly LOVING thing be to offer financial and medical assistance to the ENTIRE family, rather than pluck one or two of the youngest children away to “save” them?
Look at it this way, what if a very large Evangelical family with a special needs child fell upon extremely hard times? Dad lost his job, Mom is pregnant and on bedrest, the family van is broken and needs expensive repairs to make it drivable… in short, they need help.
Now in swoops a wealthy secular couple: “Oh, you poor things! We’ll help you… we’ll take your youngest kids off your hands, so you don’t have to clothe, feed, or care for them! That’ll lighten your load considerably. They’ll be better off with us, anyway. We’ll send them to the most elite private schools and get them into an Ivy League college. They’ll have their own rooms with ensuite bathrooms, braces and laser vision correction surgery if they need them…”
Can you see how the motives and morality of the “wealthy secular couple” in this case can be subjected to severe criticism for taking this approach to “helping” a family in crisis?
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So far, no one has responded. But maybe it’ll make some people think.
The PAP responded:
“Maybe you are not informed enough about the true situation going on in Guatemala. The corruptions and unethical situations did undoubtedly happen and that is why the country shut down adoptions more than 5 years ago. The remaining open adoption cases have all been carefully vetted and proven to be ethical and appropriate. That was determined years ago, and yet these children are still stuck in Guatemala. Plus, I was paying for the foster care for my daughter, all of her medical expenses after being brutally beaten almost to death as a 1 year old, and supplying all of her needs up until the government decided to gain control over all of the remaining adoption case kiddos. I would still gladly pay her expenses whether we ever get to bring her home or not.
The greed in Guat is what has stalled the implementation of a Hague compliant, ethical adoption system and it is the children who are suffering. It is estimated that 30,000 unwanted children die in Guat each year. That is a HUGE price to pay while waiting for the Guat authorities to build a new system. It is about greed. What it isn’t about is the best interest of the children, plain and simple. The sins of a few are being visited upon the many innocents.”
Guatemala’s super-duper greedy! It’s not a very poor developing country that is somewhat unstable and has issues ensuring basic services and a semblance of law and order for its citizens. It totally has the money and is choosing not to implement Hague!
The fact that US adoptions opened up for a nanosecond and the MASSIVE fraud/corruption resumed, causing it to de facto shut down again.
The 30,000 unwanted Guatemalan kids that die each year (as the PAP claims) would toooootally be “saved” by American families, cuz they’re very young, very healthy babies/toddlers — not, say, kids over 5 or with special needs.
Name,
Not to mention that if the PAP hadn’t “staked her claim” on a healthy one-month-old she’d probably have been adopted domestically in short order, rather than being subjected to abusive foster homes and institutions.
But at least she had the gonads to answer you. No one’s responded to my comment yet. Perhaps– please God– the reviewer is THINKING about it.