How Could You? Hall of Shame-UK-Paul Barber case

This will be an archive of heinous actions by those involved in child welfare, foster care and adoption. We forewarn you that these are deeply disturbing stories that may involve sex abuse, murder, kidnapping and other horrendous actions.

From Liverpool,UK, actor and former foster son Paul Barber recalls his nightmare foster story.

“Paul, now 63, who is best known for playing dozy Denzil in classic sitcom Only Fools and Horses, says: “I was abused when I was nine but I was so young I didn’t know it was abuse. We trust adults to look after us and they play on that – they still do.

“I was playing outside and this guy drove up and asked if I knew where a street was. I said ‘Yes’ and he said, ‘Get in and show me’.

“It was only two streets away so we drove up there. Then he asked, ‘Can you keep a secret?’ I didn’t know what was going on and I ended up performing a sex act on him.

“By the time I got home this man had bumped into my brothers and sister in the street.

“I still don’t know why, but he told them, ‘Your young brother has just done this’ and the police were called.

“My foster parents assumed it was my fault. They treated me like I was the instigator which really p***ed me off and I thought, ‘No, that’s wrong.”

Paul’s voice trembles, his anger still evident nearly five decades later.

“Those foster parents should have been looking out for me but instead they treated me like I was guilty and I have lived with that for all my life.

“I have never forgiven those people. Even though they are dead I still don’t forgive them.”

Paul, originally named Patrick, had enjoyed a happy childhood in Liverpool with his mother Margaret and older brothers Paul, Brian, Michael and sister Claudette.

His father was a sailor from Sierra Leone who died young.

But when Margaret was struck down with tuberculosis the young Barbers were sent to a local convent.

They prayed for their mum to recover but one day were ushered into an office and told she had died.

Paul said: “There was one I called Attila the nun because she was so horrible. They beat us all for anything.”

Eventually the five children were packed off to their first foster home.

It should have been an escape into a loving family but in fact it was a living nightmare.

The foster mother never cared for the children, seeing them purely as nice little earners she was free to abuse.

Paul says: “When I was 10 I ran away because she had told me to come back and close the door.

“I was always getting hit, either for not closing the door or banging it. So I ran. I thought if I went back she would clout me.

“I tried to find aunties and uncles to stay with but they all said, ‘We can’t take you in’.

“So I had to sneak back late at night and she caught me and stripped me naked and locked me in the front room.

“An aunty had given me a photograph of me when I was smaller with my mum and she took it off me and tore it up in front of my face.

“She came back in the morning and said, ‘Do you want breakfast?’ then pulled out the cane and whipped me with it. I was stark naked.

“My brothers and sisters thought this wasn’t on. So the next time I ran away we all went.

“We thought people would realise there must be something wrong. The authorities were called in and we were taken to a children’s home.

“There was less brutality in the homes than with foster parents. You are all treated the same and that’s what I liked. If one kid did something wrong we all got punished for it but I was happy with that.”

After leaving the care system Paul almost slipped into a life of crime, breaking into a shop in Liverpool to snatch jewellery. He was put on remand for two weeks and when he got out vowed to get his life on track.

Going along with a mate who was auditioning as an actor, Paul decided to have a go and landed a part in the hit musical Hair.

“Victims of abuse have had to live with these things,” he says. “Some of them go off the rails some of them hit the bottle or drugs. I ended up going to into showbusiness so you could say I ran away and joined the circus,” he adds with a laugh.

Paul admits his traumatic childhood may have had a major effect on his life. He is single and happy with his own company at a seafront home in Clacton, Essex. He says he has never wanted a long-term relationship.

“It might be because of all that, yeah,” he says. “I’m not a dad, I’m not married – I have left that to my brothers and sisters. I’ve got loads of nephews and nieces. I am the only one who has never grown up. I am not saying I can’t have relationships – of course I can –but they just don’t last long.””

Liverpool actor Paul Barber reveals abuse he suffered at the hands of nuns, brutal foster mum and a paedophile[Liverpool Echo 9/23/14]

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