How Could You? Hall of Shame-William O’Brien

By on 9-18-2014 in Abuse in adoption, How could you? Hall of Shame, International Adoption, Ireland, Mary Monaghan, US, William O'Brien

How Could You? Hall of Shame-William O’Brien

This will be an archive of heinous actions by those involved in child welfare, foster care and adoption. We forewarn you that these are deeply disturbing stories that may involve sex abuse, murder, kidnapping and other horrendous actions.

From California, adoptee Mary Monaghan was two when she was adopted by William O’Brien and his wife.

“‘My memories [of childhood] are terrible,’ Ms Monaghan says, sadly. ‘I was physically punished for not being able to eat.

‘If I did what a little child does and wet the bed, then I was literally put in the toilet. Then the sexual abuse started and it just progressed.

‘I had to be kept in my little routine as it were, so I tried to break away. It was all systematic. It was very serious paedophile thinking.’

With the O’Briens keeping up appearances in front of friends and neighbours, the bewildered little girl found herself alone and with no one to turn to.”

I could not perceive of any way of doing something and I had to protect myself. Because if I had said something and it had come to light, then I probably would not have lived another day.

‘And that is not an exaggeration. He had the world fooled.’

The abuse lasted throughout her childhood with Mary fleeing her abusive family as soon as she was old enough.”

“Mary Monaghan, now 64, was sent to live in America aged two, the Irish Catholic nuns who put her on the boat thought they were sending her to a better life.

Tragically, nothing could have been further from the truth for not only was her adoptive father William O’Brien violent, he was a predatory paedophile as well.

Now Ms Monaghan has questioned why nothing was done to help her – and why checks that would have revealed O’Brien’s desire for children, were not done

One of an estimated 60,000 children forcibly given up for adoption by nuns running the Republic of Ireland’s mother and baby homes in the 1950s and 60s, Ms Monaghan was a toddler when she was torn from her mother Theresa’s arms and sent to start a new life.

‘My mother was a fallen woman,’ says Ms Monaghan, who now lives in Massachusetts. ‘I really do not remember a lot [about the actual moment].

‘But even though you’re so young, you still have feelings. You remember being ripped away even if you don’t remember the physicalities of it.’

To the outside world, her new family appeared perfect for a lonely child taken from her mother and transported more than 5,000 miles away to California.”

“But the impact of her traumatic childhood – and the battle to find her real mother that came after – have left her scarred.

Worse still was living with the knowledge that nuns handling the adoption failed to speak to Mr O’Brien beforehand and indeed make any sort of inquiries at all.

In the event, only Mrs O’Brien was investigated by adoption agencies, with her very niceness inadvertently resulting in Mary’s nightmarish childhood.

I think if they did proper vetting, I wouldn’t have been placed in that household,’ she says. ‘How do I feel now? Well, it’s been a lot to overcome.

‘I still have flashbacks sometimes and I still struggle with substance abuse occasionally. And I have been diagnosed with post-traumatic stress disorder.'”

Although Ms Monaghan did eventually find her birth mother, it wasn’t until she was 52 that she was able to come to London to meet her.

‘Well, that was quite a moment when we first met,’ she smiles. ‘I went up to her and I hugged her and she froze. She literally froze. So it came through to me that I needed to tread lightly.’

Tragically, her mother’s shame at being an unwed parent followed her to London and Ms Monaghan says she was very reluctant to admit the truth to her Irish family.

‘It was very clear that I was to keep my mouth shut. That I was a secret. That I was a long lost cousin. I did play along even though it was hard. But some people did guess.’

The pair had just 10 years together, with Mary’s mother Theresa dying in 2010. ‘It’s just unfortunate that she had to take so much shame to her grave,’ she adds. ‘It just isn’t right.'”

Irish woman who was adopted as a child by paedophile says nuns condemned her to years of sexual abuse[Daily Mail 9/17/14 by Ruth Styles]

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