FacePalm Friday
Welcome to this week’s edition of FacePalm Friday.
This is where your hosts will list their top picks for this week’s FacePalm moment—something they learned or read about this week that caused the FacePalm to happen (you know, the expression of embarrassment, frustration, disbelief, shock, disgust or mixed humor as depicted in our Rally FacePalm smiley).
We invite you to add your FacePalm of the week to our comments. Go ahead and add a link, tell a personal story, or share something that triggered the FacePalm on the subject of child welfare or adoption.
(1) Adoption fundraisers
They are never-ending… http://www.adoptionbug.com/tshirtsforTaliaMei/ has “Adoption knows no borders” [We know Laura Silsby agreed with that sentiment when she was caught at the Haitian border with 33 children after the 2010 earthquake.] and “How do you reach 147 million orphans…one at a time.” [Again, the number is 2 million in orphanages, the rest actually live with family and the majority in orphanages also have families.]
At http://store.wildolivetees.com/adoption-fundraiser-tees-c6.aspx, you can choose among “testify”, “redeemed”, “chosen” but Rally’s favorite is the one that says “Whatever”. 
The coffee fundraiser https://justlovecoffee.com/about/beneficiary/taliamei/. You can do a few more facepalms by clicking on their blog http://thetalesoftwo.blogspot.com/ After just completing an adoption, the wife, without the knowledge of her husband, got a Special Focus file even though her agency, Madison, said she was 10th on the list.That deserves the scheming panda emoticon 
(2) People who talk about reform but have no clue
Time for adoption reform is now [MacPherson Sentinel 12/16/11by Chapman Rackaway] almost makes you think that they are headed in the right direction “For the better part of a year, my wife and I pursued domestic adoption. When we were told we could have better success by committing another $20,000, we decided to shift to an international adoption. At present, the line between the private domestic adoptions and baby selling is appallingly thin.”
But then they propose the solution of endorsing the NCFA: “Still, more needs be done. Every family who opts out and every waiting child is one more prospective adoption betrayed by the current system. Advocates like the National Council for Adoption call for adoption awareness training for pregnant women, introduction of adoption awareness modules in school sex education and family life courses, adoption counseling in federally funded maternity homes, better research on why biological parents put children up for adoption, more flexibility in state foster care funding, more aggressive and detailed standards for biological parents to regain custody and more educational assistance for foster children. Here’s hoping SRS and the legislature will add needed policy changes to their promotional efforts so more kids can find their forever families. ” 
(3) Adding 15th special needs child to a single parent family (hat tip to a reader for sharing this with us)
http://gathermychildren.blogspot.com/ . Take a look at one of the old posts here:
http://gathermychildren.blogspot.com/2008_04_01_archive.html
Where do they find the social workers to approve these homestudies?
(4) What happens when a zealous advocate posts to a nonadoption forum
http://www.homesteadingtoday.com/showthread.php?t=424067 We love farmergirl’s sane questions over several responses! Bless her heart, she wouldn’t give up!
“I’m confused. Where is he from? He is nearly an adult. Why does he need adoption? …I’m just confused by his age. At 16 I had already started college and was very independent. I still would like to know what country he’s from.
Edited to ad, I just reread the blog post and it says that he is from “Eastern Europe”. I’m all for adopting, but I find it curious that the agency wants for him to be adopted by a family in the U.S.. Why not try to find placement for him somewhere in Europe? Far more likely that he would then be around people who speak the same language and share similar cultural values…I’m still confused as to why the adoption agency isn’t trying to place him closer to home. Wouldn’t that be better for him? ..Equally odd that they require it be a homestudy family.
I’m sure there are lots of 16 year old young men in the Ukraine who are living on their own or with other people their age. Very strange. ”
And Suzyhomemaker09 “Ya know…maybe I’m in a cantankerous mood today but this has been bothering me for a long time…..AM I the only person that thinks the adoption sites with pictures of adoptable children lined up like used cars is just a little sick?
My MiL mentioned that she got an email from a local child adoption site showing children available for adoption…she said one of the kids listed was a child that lived right next door to her. As she is *FAR* from being an adoptive parent or even having contemplated such a thing it boggled my mind that she would even peruse the site.Who goes shopping for a child? ”
(5) Orphan Choirs and their connected adoption agency sponsors
Longmont Clinic welcomes orphans from Ethiopia, Honduras
“Christa Hahn and her husband, Mike, both of Windsor, brought their choir of 14 orphans — 10 from Addis Ababa, Ethiopia, and four from Tegucigalpa, Honduras — to the Longmont Clinic Tuesday morning”
“While on tour, the children spend about three hours a day on academics and also study English, music, choreography, drama and life skills. When in Colorado, the children stay at Ellerslie, a Christian church and campus in Windsor. His Little Feet also partners with Christian agencies to encourage orphan sponsorships and adoption.
“They have a chance to represent 163 million orphans that are out there in the world,” said Mike Hahn.”
Represent orphans? 163 million? This must be the new way to get kids to the US so PAPs can bond and then adopt–the entertainment visa now can be added to list with the medical visa.
(6) Year-old UNICEF-rant “ethics” post being promoted by Reece’s Rainbow clients http://ethicsalarms.com/2010/12/08/unicefs-unethical-war-against-international-adoption/
Crabbina says: There are few things more harmful than a blogger who doesn’t do his homework—especially one who blindly trusts the ravings of an agenda-laden hypocrite aka Lizzie Borden Bartholet (who took an axe and whacked away at common sense, logic, ethics, and humility). 
Don’t hold your breath waiting for Lizzie to wake up and admit that international adoption is rife with corruption. She can’t and she won’t. In the meantime, adoption industry hacks and crooks just lap up her spewings because they play right into their ends-justify-means agenda.
There is NO excuse for this blogger to have posted such a diatribe without first consulting more even-minded experts like Professor David Smolin. But that might have blown his entire argument to smithereens, too.
Complicated process blamed for lack of international adoptions is another misleading, whining article that misses the real issues behind the decline-the rampant corruption of the industry.
“Many experts say the complicated process is due in part to the Hague Agreement, which increased the amount of information and paperwork required to make sure children go to stable, safe homes.
Some families feel, though, that they are just forced to jump through more hoops to bring their children home.”
(8) Premature birth “helps” adoption
Early birth deepens bond for adoptive couple, birth mom
[Chicago Tribune 12/23/11 by Vicki Ortiz Healy]
“Surprisingly, premature birth adoptions don’t have a higher rate of falling through than any other adoptions. In some cases, the birth of a premature baby actually can help an adoption, Jaeger said.
The following does NOT give us warm fuzzies: “For Christmas, the Bennetts are taking their son to visit his grandmother in Michigan, where he’ll be showered with gifts and love from immediate and extended family.
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